Movie reviews: The Transformers (2007) – Part 20

The Transformers movie. Where do I start? I guess I’ll start with what was good about it. The Autobots (or GM) vs. the Decepticons (or Ford) both looked cool. The vehicles where cool, the planes and helicopters where cool, they transformed cool. The film was pumped stock full of cool. The old fanboys had their issues; Octimus Prime now has flames on his truck, Bubble Bee is now a sleak new camero, no longer a VW bug and Megatron is a jet now and no longer a big gun, to name just a few. The real problem here was Michael Bay. The guy goes way overboard, by the end of the movie there is so much destruction and chaos, that you no longer knew what they were all fighting for in the first place, and if you did, by then you just didn’t care. The question is what do we really expect here. It’s about machines that transform into machines for our viewing pleasure. Hey, and it looked cool.

The Transformers Movie

What’s cool about the advancement of technology is that there are certain pieces that were simply made for advanced pieces of technology, but were created too soon. A prime example would be “Dark Side of the Moon” by Pink Floyd. The sonic landscapes and incredible details of the album were simply born to be enjoyed on the crisp, clean sound that a CD player could only provide. Even though “Dark Side” was released in 1974, its full appreciation couldn’t be discovered until the advent of the CD some 15 years later. Now, “Dark Side of the Moon” is the first CD you purchase when you grow out of your little crappy radio to a full-fledged adult, amazing kick-ass stereo system.

Which brings us to film; special effects have always been an integral part of creating worlds that moviegoers could believe in. From the colorization of Oz to Moses parting to Red Sea to being chased by the Death Star, special effects are just as important as the lead actor in some films. And while we’ve always been amazed at what was created for its time, it would be interesting to see what could be done then with the technology of today.

If there is one movie that’s destined for today’s technological and special effects advances, it comes out in July of 2007: the Transformers. For years, fans and enthusiasts would imagine what a real life Transformer would look like. How would the classic cartoon incarnation of Optimus Prime, Megatron and the other Autobots and Decepticons translate to a live action, big screen adventure? Well, this year, that question will be answered.

Forget about story or character or plot development for a second, and simply focus on big giant robots beating each other up. And then, in an instant, those big giant robots will transform into a truck or a plane and rip through the city at an incredible pace. In the early days of film, the concept would probably be impossible to place on the screen and do it justice. In the golden age of film, it would look interesting, but laughable. In the special effects era of movies, it would look passable, but not believable. But now, in 2007, with all the possibilities and abilities which special effects wizards have at their disposal, the Transformers, should, at the very least, look realistic.

A common source of debate for the upcoming Transformers movie is how the characters should look. The classic cartoon appearance, while iconic and nostalgic, supposedly does not translate that well onto a live action, big screen experience. Therefore, a whole new redesign of all the characters was necessary in order to make this movie appear realistic. And that is one of the main objectives behind this movie: it has to look absolutely real. In today’s age of special effects magic, there shouldn’t be too many movies that have cheap looking production values. But, in terms of scope and size, the visual challenges of the Transformers represent some of the biggest in moviemaking history.

Of course, because this is a big-budget adaptation of a classic 80’s cartoon and comic, the whole idea is to make this a trilogy. But, nobody is going to be interested in Transformers 2 & 3 if the first one looks amateurish. This is one of those movies that could never have been made at any other time before this one, and it’s just as imperative that all the effects are done to perfection. There are some cracks at movies that you only get one shot at, with no remake really possible. This is one of those movies!

Can’t wait to see it!

Movie reviews: The Transformers (2007) – Part 48

Transformers is a lot like a trip to Wal Mart. There is way too much for your senses to take in; some of it is incredibly appealing, some of it is horribly tacky and the whole experience leaves you feeling a little tainted.

The visual effects are the draw with this film. The computer generated Autobots and Decepticons are seamless and utterly believable. At several times the screen is just a mess of CGI garble but for the most part the people at Industrial Light and Magic have realistically depicted a world where 30 foot robots come crashing to earth and change freely into cars, trucks and sport utility vehicles then back again into robots. Think about that for a second. That is not an easy feat.

The trouble with this movie is there is a whole lot more than Transformers in “Transformers”. The movie tries to be everything to everyone. It is clear that director Michael Bay has set out to entertain both children and the parents who bring them to (and pay for) the movie. However, there is also an attempt to appease the hordes of fanboys (and perhaps three fangirls) who have remained dedicated to the Transformers universe ever since they were in Snork pajamas. It seems that nothing has been left on the cutting room floor. There is a romance in there, as well as a family comedy, a military sub plot, cute robo-shenanigans and a techno caper to boot. It is a film that manages to pay homage to (or rip off, depending how cynical the viewer) Herbie the Love Bug, Short Circuit, Men in Black, Short Circuit II, Men in Black II, E.T., Starship Troopers, Independence Day, and Hackers, in no particular order.

The result, for me, is a wildly uneven movie that rambles on satisfying all of its viewers some of the time but less of us all of the time.

Movie reviews: The Transformers (2007) – Part 6

I have just watched the new Transformers movie and Sweet Jesus Sweet Christ, it rocks. It rocks hard. This is my review and while I will try not to give away too much, I must warn you that somethings will probably come through.

I’ve considered myself a Transformers traditionalist and so thought I would be annoyed with the changes that were made but to be honest as I was watching it, I found that I really wasn’t bothered by them that much. One major change did bother constantly though. Optimus Prime now has a mouth and a nose. It looked ridiculous and annoyed me greatly but other than that, there wasn’t much that really got on my nerves. Megatron, for example, has been redesigned heavily but until I watched the film I hadn’t really seen a close up of his face. When I did, he was instantly recognizable. One problem with the redesigns, however, is that Starscream and Megatron look very similar. In the battle in the city, it’s sometimes hard to figure out which is which.

Now a few problems with the plot. Overall it was great but a few things stuck out.

1. Optimus, when recounting the history of Cybertron, seems surprised that Megatron betrayed the Transformers. To be fair would you be suprised if you were betrayed by someone who was the leader of the Decepticons? The clue’s in the name.

2. Why did they take the object which the Decepticons wanted so badly to a heavily populated city, knowing that they would follow them there?

3. Upon arrival on Earth, the Autobots seem mildly retarded.

4. “My bad” really doesn’t belong in Optimus’ newly developed mouth.

There were other minor things but I’ll let them slide. Now some great things.

1. Seeing the first transformation and hearing that classic transformer sounds sent shivers down my spine.

2. When I knew that Optimus was coming, I was incredibly excited. I felt like a kid again.

3. When I first saw Optimus transform out of his truck form, I literally yelled “Yeah!” in a hotel were many people were sleeping. It’s sad but I was proper in touch with my inner child at that moment.

4. Before the Autobots showed up, the main character says to the girl he wants to get it on with “I think there’s alot more than meets the eye with you.” I enjoyed that.

5. Jazz’s first line “What’s cracking little bitches?”

6. Scorponok and Frenzy. Frenzy was one of Soundwave’s cassettes in the original series but in the film he basically takes on Soundwave’s role. He speaks and acts a little like Stripe from gremlins.

In summary, the movie was like seeing old friends that you haven’t seen in years. Sure they’ve changed a bit in appearance but who doesn’t? Obviously Soundwave would have been great. Hopefully he’s in the sequel but I swear to god if he appears in a sequel as a robot who can transform into an ipod like some have suggested, I’m gonna be right annoyed.

The world is now ready for a massive amount of old cartoon movies. A CGI Thundercats movie has now been confirmed. A live action one would have been awesome, with Samuel L. Jackson as Panthro, but I’ll take what I can get.

Also a new live action He-Man and the Masters of the Universe film will be made, produced by Joel Silver who produced such great films as V for Vendetta and Predator and such terrible films as the House of Wax remake and Richie Rich.

Who knows what the future holds. Til All Are One, Roll Out.

Remembering the 80s cartoons – Part 1

This is a great topic to write about. I believe that cartoons of the ’80s were the greatest ever. I was born in 1980 so my earliest memories are actually of watching cartoons during the middle and late ’80s. Today’s cartoons, which are mostly replaced now by computer animation, seem inferior to those of the ’80s. There was something special about a cartoon drawn by hand that computer animation is missing.

Transformers (now a blockbuster motion picture) really set the standard for action heroes with the battle between the Autobots and Decepticons. Every little boy (and maybe even some girls) owned Transformer toys. I had several Autobot toys that actually transformed back and forth between the car and the Autobot. I can remember the commercials that used to air for the action figures: always had that slogan, “Transformers…More than meets the eye.” It was an awesome cartoon.

Thundercats was yet another adventurous cartoon of the battle between good and evil. Once again, I owned the action figures for this cartoon as well. What boy wouldn’t run around the house pretending to be a character? Today’s cartoons lack the thrill and I rarely ever see a kid pretending to be an action hero. This is because there are no good action heroes for a kid to idolize anymore!

The ’80s were a great time to be a kid because we had some awesome cartoons to excite our imaginations. I often think back to these cartoons and I wish kids today had similar experiences to look back on when they grow up.

The most despicable cartoon character in TV history – Part 1

Megatron was not even the most despicable of the Decepticons, never mind the most despicable cartoon character. He earned his role as a Decepticon general and after they crashed on earth he naturally became leader of the Decepticons on earth despite repeated attempts by otehrs to dethrone him. Later repeated defeats by Optimus Prime and other’s drove Megatron insane and only then did he become the truly ruthless monster that appears in the original TV series and the first animated movie. Megatron tolerated the very unsubtle attempts by Starscream to undermine his leadership for a long time in the comics, partially because he was the most powerful of the decepticon jets and very useful but primarily because he was a member of the decepticon army. Megatron had a sense of Honor, before he was driven mad their were several opportunity’s in the original comic series and associated stories when he could have killed Optimus Prime and other Autobots but chose not to because it broke his own code of Honor or because he saw it as unnecessary, the first being in the very first issue of the transcormers comic.

In one story in a transformers annual released in the UK we see the origin of the rivalry between Megatron and Optimus Prime and we also see Megatron when he first joined the Decepticons, along with Ravage. The Decepticon rebellion on Cybertron has just started and Megatron and Optimus Prime are escorting an Autobot elder from one city to another along with two of the elders bodyguards, one of which is Ravage. At this point Megatron and Optimus Prime are friends, their is a continuous philosophical discussion throughout the story which ends with the death of the elder, killed by decepticons despite the best efforts of Megatron, Optimus Prime and Ravage, he dies from lack of energy due to his old age. Optimus Prime is injured and Megatron and Ravage refuse to give the old transformer energy to preserve his life, they declare that the old order should be allowed to die and that they are going to join the Decepticons.

This shows that Megatron had a code of Honor, he was a loyal autobot until he became disillusioned by them and even after choosing to join the decepticons he remained loyal to the mission. This demonstrates personality traits which are far from despicable!

Examples of despicable Decepticons:

Starscream

Soundwave

Shockwave

Among many others!

Movie reviews: The Transformers (2007) – Part 49

In the interest of full disclosure I’m going to confess before I say anything else that I knew absolutely nothing about the Transformers before yesterday other than they were toys that have been hanging around for about the last twenty-five years or so. I have never seen their animated television program or read their comic books, or played one of their video games, so I had about as much interest in the movie as most men have in picking out wedding china. And here I was, surrounded by hundreds of men, anxiously waiting for the film to begin. The Transformers are obviously a magnet for testosterone as the audience was ripe with the buzz of male energy. Tim Allen would have been proud. I haven’t seen so many butch straight guys like that all in one room since that night in 1978 at a back bar in Tulsa, OK after a Hell’s Angels convention rolled into town, but that is a story for another place and time.

As for the Transformers themselves, well, the movie was everything a Transformers fan could hope for (I suppose). Considering the opening credits began with “Presented by Paramount Pictures and Dreamworks Productions” and then “Hasbro Toys” I found it hard not to burst into fits of laughter, but considering I was surrounded by a group of men that looked like they could tear the heart out of a deer while it was still alive I did my best to stifle all of my natural reactions.

There was a brief prologue to the story for novices like myself that would have probably been best left out because it buzzed by so quickly and was so complicated with its extraterrestrial visuals literally swirling around in circles while we were fed a voiceover explaining the history of the Transformers, with the “good” Autobots and the “evil” Decepticons (with a name like that how could they not be evil? Then there was some blah, blah about the Allspark, a cube that looked like that thing from the Hellraiser movies that opens the doors to Hades and frees the wicked Pinhead; either that, or it could be a gigantic Borg cube that houses a colony of thousands of Borg drones like in Star Trek: First Contact coming to destroy earth and assimilate the population. Sorry, but there weren’t any pictures of the thing except of it floating alone in space, so it was impossible to tell how big it was. The problem is the sci fi hokum already seems so familiar that it is distracting. I was glad when the action switched to earth, where the all-important cube apparently landed a hundred years ago after

More than meets the eye: Anticipating the release of the Transformers movie – Part 4

My excitement at the pending release of a CGI Transformers movie is tampered by my trepidation – I am chanting to myself, “Please don’t mess it up, please don’t mess it up”.

While the loss of Frank Welken (Megatron’s original voice) is a serious blow, I think Hugo Weaving (of Elrond and Agent Smith fame) will make an exceptional substitute. His highbrow, snooty, I’m-better-than-you-are villainy is perfect for the part. And Peter Cullen reprising his role as Optimus is essential.

Other changes seem a bit extreme. Bumblebee is now a Camaro, rather than a VW Bug? Tough to swallow, but I suppose the movie must go where the sponsors pay it to go. And rather than pick more from an already established pool of characters, the movie has opted to bring in some totally new ‘bots, and I question the necessity of such a move. There are dozens upon dozens to choose from, why make more?

The trailers make the special effects look magnificent. Hopefully the quality of the rest of the movie matches the brief glimpses we’re being given. Often we are given the choice cuts in a trailer to bring us in, only to find the best part of the movie is one we’ve seen twenty times on TV without paying for a ticket. “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe” comes to mind…

Already the fan blogs are filled with wails and howls of indignation – “How dare they do (this, that, t’other) to my favorite character!” But keep in mind, this is a twenty-year old franchise, and it has been in sore need of a face-lift ever since the Headmasters debacle. This is one change that needed to happen, and while it won’t look like the Transformers we’re used to (the robot forms of both sides are much more spidery and articulated than in the cartoon), this particular bow to the demand for “realistic” fantasy will probably turn out to be quite nice.

All in all, I will be going to opening night no matter what I hear. I simply can’t pass it up. But I do have some slight reservations…

Movie reviews: The Transformers (2007) – Part 5

Transformers, the live action movie. The very idea had gave me a roller coaster of emotions. On the one hand, this was the movie I had wanted to see since before I could walk, on the other hand, this was the movie I had wanted to see since before I could walk. It was a movie that could go very very well or a movie that could go very very bad.

It ended up somewhere in between. It was surprisingly good, but it could have been better.

The movie is about the Transformers quest to find the Allspark, a power source which can give life to random machines (Vector Sigma in a handy cube form, for fans of the original). The Autobots want to use it to restore their dying home world, Cybertron, the Decepticons want to form an army to conquer the Universe. A fairly typical Transformers type plot.

The film starts with a sceen showing some army guys talking and straight away the crucial error is made. The focus of the movie lies far too much with people. Regular guys.

Almost imediately this sceen is followed by a Decepticon attack, which is incredibly cool to watch, but no detail is ever followed up as to the Decepticon’s background.

*Spoilers*

Apart from Bumblebee, who despite not saying anything still manages to be cool, the other Autobots do not arrive until an hour into the film. They are then given a few sceens, but nothing major. Only Optimus Prime and, to a lesser degree, Ironhide come across as having any character at all. When Jazz is brutally murdered, it’s very difficult to care. His character is not even slightly developed and he’s different enough from the original cartoons so that not even hardcore fans will feel connected.

The Decepticons are recieve even less character development. Megatron and Starscream don’t appear until almost two hours into the film, Megatron spending the entire time in a giant freezer. The whole Megatron – Starscream love hate relationship, a very key feature of the original cartoons, is given only one line, when Megatron announces Starscream has failed him “Once again.”

Presumably, when doing a live action, it’s just alot easier to focus on real people than imaginary robots. But it’s the imaginary robots we came to see. No one cares about some girl working for some computer type people and her friend the hacker.

On the positive side, the transformers are incredibly cool to watch and certain moments will make real fans incredibly happy, no matter how much they want to hate it. For example, anyone with any claim to being a fan could not help themselves at bubbling up with glee when Optimus Prime announces,

“One shall stand, one shall fall.”

Movie reviews: The Transformers (2007) – Part 46

Transformers: More Than Sliced the Eye

In 1929, Luis Bunuel shocked audiences in an early scene from his film Un Chien Andalou (An Andalusian Dog) depicting a women’s eye being sliced open by a razor. The image, now nearly eight decades old, continues to twist viewers in their seats. In the realm of special effects, its achievement depends more on the expectations of the viewer than the technical production. The actual image shown on the screen is of a dead cow’s eye being sliced open, but through tight editing with the image of a razor passing before a women’s face, the cows head is rarely detected.

While Bunuel hoped to mask the mechanics of his craft, Michael Bay is depending on his craftsmanship of mechanical objects to awe rather than shock his audiences. Transformers, the film adaptation of a popular children’s toy and comic book series from the 1980s, progresses with the measured pacing of an inaugural film in what is sure to be a very lucrative franchise. The story maintains decent plausibility for adults while maintaining accessibility for younger audiences. Two warring factions of robots, the protective Autobots and evil Decepticons, are drawn to Earth in search of an all powerful power source, referred to as the All Spark. The tale follows two major plotlines: that of Sam Witwicky, the unsuspecting hero in possession of crucial information to the discovery of the treasure and another focused on a small Army unit that unwittingly entangles itself with the cruel Decepticons. Sam Witwicky, played by Shia Lebeouf (Disturbia), is the traditional teenage hero, beset by contemporary versions of age-old themes: frustrating parents, the unattainable girl and a lack of a car. We have seen all of these things before, but Bay does a nice job of layering these human interactions against the developing robot story. Similarly, the secondary plot following the Army unit appears to function solely as a means to introduce action in the early scenes of the film. Eventually, the two plots intertwine, with the much-anticipated conflict between the robots accompanied by their human allies.

It would be unfair to expect a film based on giant fighting robots to be character driven, which makes the performance of Shia Lebeouf as Sam Witwicky notable. This promising actor shined most when opposite engaging characters. His interactions with his quirky parents, played by Kevin Dunn and Julie White, had the glimmer of an interesting plot line that could have developed,

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